I'm a farmer-loving album cover quotin' kinda girl

Yes that says "I know you're married, but I've got feelings too."

Not since Yo La Tengo's "I'm not afraid of you and I will beat your ass" have I loved an album title so much.

I saw Martha last year when she opened for Swell Season and I didn't really enjoy it. Fast forward to today when I'm listening to an advance of her album that comes out June 3rd...and liking it. For more than just the title.

I'm waiting for Seann William Scott to get here. (Aren't we all?) I have 3 stories to write but I would prefer to know what order I should write them in and I don't.

It's time I admit that I am officially ADDICTED to Farmer Wants a Wife. It started as "oh that's shot in an area I know and have been to." Now it's "that girl should win and I want to be friends with those girls." Last night I actually said aloud, "I think if Amanda doesn't win, I'm really going to be sad." She just seems really perfect. I also like Ashley and Christa and would like to be a member of their clique. I don't think I've ever cared about a relationship reality show more. It's really well done with the challenges and different eliminations each week. Two thumbs up. Good job CW.

In other news I'm joining my mom and Melody in a boycott of all things Best Buy related. (of course if something happens to my camera, it's still under warranty there, but fingers crossed I don't have to deal with them). My laptop is in worse condition having paid a visit to the Geek Squad. The guys there were super condescending and kept my computer for 8 days and lied to me over the phone despite having been able to diagnose the problem on sight when I dropped it off. Needless to say I got a refund for the diagnostic they supposedly completed. Sucks to not have the laptop to dump pictures onto before I leave for vacay tho. Wunh wunh. I'm just going to wait to deal with it when I get back.

Are You There God? It's Me Margaret...

It's days like these that make me wish I had a personal assistant to organize all aspects of my life while being thrilled to clean my apartment. Just gots lots of stuff to organize and keep straight. Lists abound.

It's been over a week since I've paid a visit to this site, so I thought I'd fill whatever random readers I have in on what's been happening.

Last Monday...I got off work early in order to head to the beach to tape our Summer Movie Guide. On the way, I got a ticket while trying to drop off my disagreeable laptop at Best Buy. I also dropped off the scuba gear (at Sport Chalet, not Best Buy), the action of which required not one but two support calls. I stopped to get my hair cut before finally landing on the beach. (Quite the productive trip west, n'est-ce pas?)

Monday night I learned that my job going to send me to Kansas to interview Conner Humphreys (the kid who played young Forrest Gump who is now all grown up and getting out of the Army after serving in Iraq). My boss suggested since I had the long weekend I might as well drive over to St Louis and holiday with the fam.

Tuesday was a whirlwind of writing and packing and prepping.

Flew to Kansas City Weds. Did you know the city is known for its fountains? It's second only to Rome for the most fountains in the world. I heart fountains. Weds night I got first fans for Indiana Jones.

Thursday I fed the first fans story and then headed to Fort Riley (a two hour drive). I followed some storm chasers which was interesting. But not as interesting as the sign I saw for a Rifle and Bible church. I alternated between KDL's Spring Mix and the country/Christian mix offered on the area radio stations.

My interview with Conner was fun. I thanked him for his services of protection and entertainment.

From Fort Riley (I feel like I should insert an animated map graphic here), I drove two hours south to Wichita to visit with my gma's bff Miss Ruthie. She's 97. She calls me Yup because when I was little that's all I would ever say to her when she asked me questions. She recites and writes poetry and she's an amazing person and I will post some video of her when I get my computer back. We had dinner and I stayed with her for the night.

Friday I woke up early and drove the 6-7 hours to St Louis. I only got pulled over once and I didn't get a ticket (which is a great thing, seeing as how I had already got one moving violation that week). You should know that I haven't been pulled over in like 10 years. Anyway I made it to the StL and was met by an excited-to-see-me Hunter.

Went to dinner with the fam, then laid in Hunter's bunk beds having a heart-to-heart until after midnight. He's only 4 and most of what I remember talking about includes the story of me puking and the fish eating it (he loves that story!) but still...fun moments.

Saturday I hung out with gma and Melody. I ran into one of the girls I was a youth leader for back when she was in 7th grade and I was much younger. She's now a mom and getting ready to get married. Crazy how people grow up so fast. Speaking of, I surprised my dad's family at my cousin's daughter's graduation party. I remember when I saw Baby Christie for the first time in her little carseat. Now she's almost 18 and graduating high school and off to pursue her own journalism degree and career.

So that was fun. I rode down with Melissa's fam and had to fight the peer pressure to let them use a big heavy book to "pop" the ganglion cyst that's developed on my right hand. (It wasn't that hard to fight.)

Spent Saturday night with my grandma so I could take her to her church Sun morning. Nearly got misty eyed when I saw a soon-to-be dad reach over and touch the baby bump during one of the prayers. The weekend was also full of watching (and feeling) Jett play around in his in utero playground. I also taught Hunter the Juno Hot Wheels car trick (where it rolls down the hill of the belly) which may or may not be a good thing.

BBQd and stayed Sunday night with my parents. Saw my friend Laurie's huge grown up house. I asked her if I bought one did she think a husband and kid would come with it? Her 2 year old called me "that lady" and I liked it. Mostly because she wasn't like "Who's that lady?" it was more like "I want that lady to fasten my chair, help me wash my hands, eat, etc." Super cute.

I lunched with my mom and gma and aunt and Melody before picking out a purse and shoes for my bday. (Which is a week from today but let's not talk about it...One more week of 20s??!? I'm not ready...)

Got back into LA only to hear that Sydney Pollack died. Which made me super sad. I was all "I just talked to him and he was fine." Turns out I talked to him last June (a great one on one sit down) and he probably was sick then and didn't say. Ben produced the obit today and watching Sydney give me advice almost made me cry.

I've scheduled my plans to go to Chico, CA in June to see Chris, my friend from Paris, get married. I still have to organize my trip to Grand Cayman better. I leave Sunday. Time is ticking. I'm excited for time to not matter. I'm excited for sun and warmth and relaxation.

I'm also excited for a Seann William Scott instudio interview. Mike is gonna do the interviewing but I volunteered to produce the piece so that I can lurk with purpose.

Jury is still out on how I felt about the Grey's season finale, which I just watched last night (while tiredly unpacking and trying to not think about Sydney). I did, of course, have a favorite line:

"I believe that we can be extraordinary together rather than ordinary apart."

The Dark Place

Meredith: Are you in the dark place?
Christina: (nods)
Meredith: Yeah, me too.

It's those little tidbits that remind me of how Grey's Anatomy used to be and keep me hanging on hopefully through the crap that it's become.

I found myself in the dark place last night.

What was to be my first extended day of scuba diving in the Pacific Ocean will now be remembered as a 9 hour bout of seasickness hell that I couldn't escape. Needless to say the whole diving thing never happened.

I took a bonine and a dramamine an hour before the boat left the dock. It didn't seem to matter. During the two hour ride over to Catalina, I felt progressively worse. Everyone said I would feel better once I got in the water, so they put me in the water first thing and helped me put on my equipment. Shortly thereafter is when I started throwing up. In the water. It was less fun than it sounds.

I was then told I could go ahead and dive and that I could puke through the regulator if I needed to. That didn't sound like fun to me. I snorkeled around a little bit. Saw the tops of the kelp forest. And then puked some more.

Note: They also kept telling me that if I DID puke the fish would come a-runnin and really love me!!! Puke and we'll see more fish! Who are these people that can puke and still go on to have fun? I'm not a fun post-puker.

Note #2: Even tho they were all strangers, they were all super nice and I could tell they felt bad, but still...

I struggled with the decision to try to dive or get back on the rocking boat. Neither option at the moment seemed attractive. Fearful of the whole puking through the regulator at 60 feet thing, I chose the boat. So the rest of my day was spent heaving over the side of the boat or curled up under my hat on one of its decks. Not quite the experience I paid $135 for.

So here I am, two weeks to the day from my first day in Grand Cayman, and no scuba certification. My regular teacher (who was not with me yesterday) cancelled my follow-up dive today for fear of dehydration. She's now not available until the last weekend of June to finish my training. The make-up dives will cost me hundreds of dollars. That was one expensive day of puking let me tell you. In addition, the certification will come post Grand Cayman, and I don't really have plans to scuba otherwise.

Obviously I can Grand Cayman it up without scuba-ing. I'll enjoy snorkeling. And now I know to avoid boats.

It's just a bummer. I felt really defeated.

A Good Day to be a Californian

And not just because of the weather.

I seriously wanted to congratulate and hug strangers.

Love is love is love. Just because I want to marry someone of the opposite sex doesn't mean that everybody has to.

So, the dive yesterday. The stats:

water temp: 57 degrees

visibility: 5 feet

depth: 25 ft

bottom time: 11 minutes

I was least comfortable with the 5 foot visibility and overall murkiness of the water. I didn't really see that there was anything to look at, and I had a difficult time equalizing, but I am super glad to get this first dive out of the way.

I had been most worried about the cold, which turned out to not be a problem at all. The wet suit really does work. Who knew?

I had taken an excedrin PM and half a zanny and was asleep between 7h30 and 8 Weds night. And it was lovely. I LOVED going to bed so early. I'm sure the drugs helped. And when my alarm went off at 3:37a, I marveled at how weird it felt to be so well rested so early in the morning. I thoroughly enjoyed my hour and a half drive in the wee small hours of the morning through LA. It really is the best time to drive around this city. And it was me and Ira Glass and This American Life and it was really cathartic. I enjoyed the sunrise over the mountains...It's like this whole world that I never concern myself to see.

I'm going to be seeing it a lot over the next couple of days. Tomorrow I have to be at the boat by 6. The boat is in a different harbor than the one I went to yesterday but still like an hour and a half away. (Yay! more drugs for an early night's sleep!)

My instructor can no longer make it so I'm going to be with all strangers, which doesn't thrill me, but the substitute instructor called me yesterday and seems nice enough.

Unlike the Catalina Express which only takes 45 minutes to get to the island, the dive charter takes 2 and a half hours. one way. the goal is three dives, but i can get by with two. i've been promised both slightly warmer water and better visibility. fingers crossed. because this time I'll actually have to perform skills underwater. The boat's set to return to the mainland at like 7 at which point I have to bust a move to the store to get an air fill BECAUSE...

Sunday morning, at 5h30a, I have my beach dive here:

Um, yeah, look at those waves. All I have to do is swim through them and then dive down. What? Like that sounds hard?

Needless to say, I'm gonna be wiped Sunday night. Monday we're taping our Summer Movie Guide at the beach, so that should be pretty chillaxed. And then we have a ridiculously long Memorial Day weekend in which I'll be prepping for the big GC. WHERE, by the way, the water temp is 80 degrees and the visibility is 100 feet.

Keeping my eye on the prize.

mixing work and play

As you may or may not know, when I'm not blogging here, I'm getting paid to write/produce for a show called Dailies on a network called Reelzchannel. It's all about movies, dontcha know.

Ok, well I pitched (and was successful!) a weekly segment that is also sponsored (thanks Zyrtec!). It's called Cinewherever, and it's about watching movies in fun ways that don't involve the traditional movie theater.

I'm mentioning it now/again, because random people that I don't know read this blog for some reason, and maybe they have a suggestion. If you don't see your city on the list below, that means I don't know of a screening in your area. If YOU do, please comment me and pass along the info. You will be rewarded with a warm fuzzy feeling.

Oh! I forgot the best part! Today I further pitched that it should be ME that gets to go to these places. That idea also got approved. I won't be going to every single one, but I will definitely be hitting up the cities I wanna see (or the interesting screening setups). My boss said something about me being there being good for Reelz.

Ok, so here's the preliminary list.

LA (duh)
San Francisco
NYC
Seattle
St. Louis
Poughkeepsie, NY
Raleigh, NC
Boulder, CO
Washington DC
Chicago
Portland
Metropolis, IL
Dyersville, Iowa

PS If you DO see your city on the list and wanna know about the screening series in your area, lemme know and I will pass it on.

Alright...I gotta get back to it...full first ocean scuba experience regurgitation is forthcoming. I can't believe it's now 5h30 and I've been awake for 14 hours. That doesn't sound as bad as when it was 9h30a and I had already been up for 6 hours.

Heaven

I was tired of it playing automatically. Check out the GP reunion here.

I'm not political, but...

this excites me like whoa!!

I'm pretty 100% sure an Obama-Edwards ticket would be unbeatable.

You've got the guy with all the dreams and the guy with the how-to attitude.

I'm not saying I'm against a woman being president, but I don't think she can win.

I just really think this is a good idea.

Please realize that I haven't read like an entire history of what they have or haven't voted for or against. I don't know the ins and outs of their politics. I'm just a fan of their ideas and energies. Not to mention that after Edwards' speech I really wanted to hug him. I wonder if Obama's writer wrote it.

In other news, I'm superficially excited about the confirmation that Brangelina is indeed expecting twins. Keep on keeping on Jolie-Pitts. They're like my second favorite fam after the Stefani-Rossdales. I can't wait to see all these babies.

I'm getting into the Pacific Ocean (outfitted scuba style) for the first time in the wee small hours of tomorrow morning. Fingers crossed everybody. Think warm thoughts for me. I'm most nervous about the cold water temp. Second most nervous about the possibility of a great white sighting. Third most nervous about being able to fall asleep by 8p tonight so that I can wake up in the 3 o'clock hour.

Update

Turns out there IS an apartment available in the building de mes reves. I stopped by yesterday and one of the tenants was watering plants. I inquired about the building owner and she told me they lived across the street. She also told me one of the units was being fixed up and was empty.

The owner's son gave me a tour of the apartment which is of course super cute. It's the back unit with its own entry. One shared wall. More than enough space (what would I do with a dining room?) and character (faux fireplace and built in shelves in the living room? but of course) to make me happy. The coup de grace? A mudroom off the kitchen with a washer and dryer...IN THE UNIT. Hello lover. Right?

The downside is there's no parking. (screeching brakes here) BUT an actual washer and dryer IN THE UNIT trumps a laundry room on premises. Could I deal with the no parking spot? It wouldn't be my favorite, but having my own laundry facilities would be.

As we walked out of the unit, I was like, alright...give it to me straight...how much? (Yes I asked this after I fell in love with the apartment because let's face it I'm already in love with the building so OF COURSE I'll be in love with the unit)...

$1800-$1850 is what he's thinking his mom is going to charge. Whathuh?? I mean it's super cute and I understand you just refinished the floors and painted and installed a washer and dryer but COME ON! There's not even parking!!

I obviously can't in good faith pay that much each month just to live somewhere. He was gonna double check with his mom and I'm supposed to call tomorrow, but obviously, hopes are kinda dashed.

So the search continues...luckily there were no mice outside my door this morning.

Rainy Days and Mondays

I could have handled a gloomy monday if I hadn't:

A. woke up late because I set my alarm for PM instead of AM
B. been experiencing the worst part of my special visitor (apologies for TMI)
C. *aka the kicker* FOUND A DEAD MOUSE IN THE HALLWAY OUTSIDE MY DOOR.

I uttered a noise and shut my door again. Willing for the deceased little creature to disappear. If I'm looking on the bright side I would say that at least he (or she) wasn't IN MY APARTMENT. But still. I already have to deal with a mice/rat infestation at work. I DON'T WANT THEM AT MY HOUSE TOO!

I don't live in a crappy area. My apartment is nice. I pay $1350 a month in rent, for Heaven's sake!!!! NO MICE ALLOWED! Admittedly the building leaves MUCH to be desired and this is just the last straw to break the camel's back.

What that means tho is that I'll have to move again, and I'm tired of moving unless it's to an exciting new city or something. Obviously I'm not ready to do that at this juncture, but as I've mentioned before my fear of commitment is never more evident than it is when someone asks me to sign a lease.

But the writing is on the wall. I was the third person to see the little dude in the hallway this morning. One of those other people was the apt manager. And the thing was STILL THERE. I have yet to receive a reply text from such manager who I informed over 3 hours ago that I was more than freaked out about our newest tenant.

Alright, so enough of that. This wkend rewind blog was sposed to be a lot more fun.

Speaking of "writing on the wall"...a group of us caught Russell Brand (you know him from Forgetting Sarah Marshall) last night at the Roxy. He performed stand up comedy and it was magical. He's an admitted sex addict and that equals a night of raunchy fun. He invited groupies to stay around to see if they still liked him after the laughter stopped. He offered to autograph uteruses. I told you it was raunchy. But for as repulsive as the idea of him should be, he is incredibly endearing. Watching him perform is like having a random public conversation. It doesn't seem like a rehearsed or written-down act. He's just our friend telling us about the time he wrote Serena Williams an inappropriate email or met Macaulay Culkin for the first time.

His jokes about MAC and Michael Jackson were HIGHlarious. "Neverland? Sometimes Land? Not-on-a-school-night Land?"

The evening's highlight for NDG and I happened before the show outside of the venue with a Morrissey sighting. She documented our exchange on her blog and I've reprinted it here without her permission.

MAB: is that...?
NDG: oh my god. wait. is that?
MAB: yes. that's. yeah. yes.
NDG: yes. is that who i think it is?
MAB: yes. uh huh.
NDG: seriously. wait. yes.
MAB: i just want to walk up and hug him from behind.
NDG: oh my god.

I'll have you know he was standing less than four feet from us during that convo. Brian Grazer was also at the show. And then we saw Dave Navarro at Swingers, but Morrissey...that's a sighting.

Yesterday was my last day in the pool for scuba diving training. I also took - and passed! - the written test. So next step is the Pacific Ocean. EEK! My teacher thinks it would be a good idea for me to get into the ocean before our boat dives on Saturday. (so that I can acclimate myself to the idea of being in cold oceanic water) Super nice of her. Except for the fact that I have to meet her at a beach a little more than an hour away from my house at 5:30 in the morning on Thursday! OUCH! Early and cold?! YUCK.

I just gotta keep my eye on the prize that is diving in the Caribbean (which will be WARM water!). 20 days to go!

Otherwise this weekend, I did laundry, started fake baking to get a base tan (hello freckles!), and oh yeah, saw What Happens in Vegas. Which I liked. And would call good. I know what you're thinking. Really MAB? Ashton Kutcher? Cameron Diaz? Yep. I laughed out loud. A lot. And it didn't get super cheesy until the end when they threw in every cliche possible. Were there any surprises? No. You know how it's gonna go, but it was fun. And enjoyable. Just what a fun Saturday night movie should be. Rob Cordrry and Lake Bell shine as supporting characters.

NDG and I decided we would love to have one of those crazy nights in Vegas. I always stop short of getting crazy wasted because I don't like puking, but if I knew that I could get away without a hangover I would immediately sign up. I figure, however, the potential of those days of unabashed drinking and partying have probably passed.

PS I have deduced that I like Ashton Kutcher in predictable romantic comedies. If you haven't seen A Lot Like Love, you should. Amanda Peet's character's apartment is in my neighborhood, down the street from the Ks place. I a lot like love it. Too bad there's not an availability in THAT building right now.

TGIF

This site is a dream come true for me. I can't tell you how often (altho people who watch tv or see movies with me probably can) I hear a song and I'm like what is it? who sings it? how do I make it mine? BECAUSE THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I'M GOING THROUGH...well that's usually what I'm thinking.

Sidebar...can I admit how much I loved the instrumental version of "Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered" that played during the Inspiration Point scene in "Speed Racer"? Well I did. A lot. I love that song.

Here's Miss Ella's version:



For some more youtube goodness, may I suggest the Battle at Kruger:



I watched a story about it on the news this morning, and one of the men from the group was on. It's going to be a special on National Geographic Sunday night because the things they captured on video have never been seen before.

I don't wanna ruin anything, but know that I wouldn't post a video like this if it didn't turn out ok. It really is incredible.

This coming Sunday is my last SCUBA day in the pool. We also have to take our final exam. I hope it's not a scantron.

The Inspector Detective Suspected Foul Play

The subj line was one of my favorite lines in "Speed Racer."

I saw the IMAX version last night.

Too long for a kids movie and over their heads? Yes.
Still a fun ride? Yes.

The racing parts were magnificent and the whole thing was super visually stimulating. The colors were vibrant. It felt like you were watching a video game or on a theme park ride.

We sat in the very back/top row suspecting that IMAX and racing together might be intense. And for the first 5 minutes I wavered on whether I would vomit or not, but once it got going I was ok.

The business story line at times was hard for us to understand, and I could see the 3 year olds a couple rows down getting ancy.

Other things I'd like to say about the movie:

Emile Hirsch is a great versatile actor.
- I love John Goodman. Especially when he kicks ass.
- Monkeys. In. Movies. Thumbs up.
- Scott Porter is hot.
- This movie is probably insanely awesome if you're on acid. I obviously was not, but at times it's so trippy on its own that I can only imagine how visually enhancing drugs would affect it.
- Several one liners made us LOL due to their cheesiness. I'm not sure if it was on purpose, but it made the experience more enjoyable.

In conclusion, it's over 2 hours long, and the business part of the story line isn't the greatest of entertainment. But if you're going to see it, definitely do theater over dvd. unless you have like a home theater or something. Then invite me over. I like home theaters.

You'll be happy to know

I just scored presale tix to the Swell Season show in San Diego...in October. They're playing with Iron & Wine.

I'm a happy girl.

Hopefully I will be as lucky with the LA presale.

It's a dog-eat-dog world

NDG and I rarely disagree when it comes to entertainment, well ok, usually we have differing opinions on the quality of Grey's Anatomy episodes, but for the most part, we're onboard with each other.

Until now.

The subject of our discord? Beverly Hills Chihuahua.

NDG says it will give kids the wrong impression that it's better to be from Beverly Hills than Mexico.

She's probably right. But commercialism and patriotism is shoved down their throats enough that I don't think this eensy teensy adorable hilarious-looking movie about miniature dogs is really going to make a difference in their way of thinking.

I do worry however that it might only work in trailer form and not be able to continue the entertainment and laughs long enough to sustain a feature length film.

I showed it to Jon and he admitted it was catchy.
Now it's your turn.

Dear Blue Shield of California,

You guys are assh*les.

It's not bad enough that you rake me over the coals in return for the minimum amount of coverage.

But now you're just being mean.

Let me back up, I got a letter in the mail today. And I quote (this was in BOLD people!!!):

"Your birthday will move you into a new age category, and because medical risks generally rise with age, your plan rate will also increase."

SERIOUSLY? REALLY Blue Shield? If I was turning 60 (like my Unc Sam) or 65 (like my dad) I could understand getting a letter like this warning me of the potential/impending health problems that will occur now that I've reached this "new age category."

Is this like Disneyland changing the It's A Small World ride to accommodate "modern weights"?

What is going on here people???

For the record, I know younger people who live much riskier lifestyles.

The letter goes on to reiterate that the increase ($16 a month) is based only on your change in age. (they bolded that part too)

I get it. I'm getting older. I'm crossing a threshold of sorts. Get off my back.

--------------------
I'm listening to Sara Bareilles' "Many the Miles" and just identified with the following quote like whoa.

"Red letter day I'm in a blue mood wishing the blue would just carry me away"

Thank God for Mel & Rose and my recent discovery that they carry my Kinder goodness.

I'm going to straighten up a bit more and then go to bed and rest my tired old body. I'm surprised I'm still up. It being after 10 and all. Blue Shield would be proud.

Takin it all in

Friday night I got ridiculously close to Tom Petty.

It was the last night of the week of Mudcrutch shows at the Troub. Not even my painful-yet-adorable heels and a crazy crowd could keep me from enjoying this show. I think I scared a former coworker when I knew all the words to "Summertime Blues."

I know I said (maybe not on here but in real life) that I was going to cut down on shows this year, but I just can't. This coming weekend I have Russell Brand at the Roxy. Mommy likes.

Yesterday was Sunday which means Dive Day. What a difference a week makes. I was probably like 100% more comfortable with the regulator. Especially because we did even harder and scarier things. My regulator was pretty much like my comfort binky. As long as I had it in my mouth I knew I would be okay.

We spent the majority of our pool time at the bottom of the 13 feet pool. It did take me a while to equalize on the way down, but I got it. So we were on the bottom of the pool and I was like, wow, I'm really doing this. And I'm ok with it. I'm not panicking. Then came the exercise wherein we took off our masks. WHAT? Yeah I guess it's a possibility or something and we had to practice. Before we complete a challenge our teacher always gives us the "ok" sign that we then have to mirror back to her so she knows that we're ready. For this particular exercise when she ok'd me I shook my head back. WAS SHE KIDDING ME?! I then asked (all in rudimentary hand signals) if I could hold my nose. (Once our mask was taken off, she would swim us around the deep end and then we would have to replace the mask and clear it of the water (a skill we learned back when we played in the shallow end last week - if you'll remember, I didn't like it then either).

Long story short too late, I was petrified, swimming around, holding my nose, breathing through my regulator like it was the lifeline that it is. The other guy in my class said you could see my fear. I'm sure it wasn't pretty. When it came time to put the mask back on. I panicked and choked but she held me in place. If I were 60 feet down and something similar happened, I wouldn't be able to shoot to the surface. I coughed and choked through my regulator and it worked. I calmed myself through the panic and got my mask on and got it clear. It wasn't the most fun experience of my life, but it was definitely a big confidence booster.

We did a few more tasks and when we got to the surface I thanked her for not letting me swim to surface when I freaked out. She said if I would have really freaked out I would have fought her and swam to surface so that I should give myself some credit. Then she said class was over because I took in more water than she was comfortable with.

I also learned more about what the weekend of May 17-18 holds in store for me. On Sat the 17th, we'll be doing 3 dives from a boat off the coast of Catalina (there are some ship wrecks there, so that should be cool). 3 dives in one day is kinda scary tho, but it does make me feel better about the $135 cost of the charter boat (lunch is included too). Then on Sunday the 18th, we'll go to Leo Carrillo beach in Malibu. We'll do a free dive (which is where we dive down on a held breath - no regulator) and then a swim-out scuba dive (wherein we swim out a couple hundred yards from the shore and then dive). Yeah. WHAT? Needless to say, I will only be sleeping and diving that weekend.

Oh. Totally unrelated, but I discovered the most wonderful thing this weekend. Investigation Discovery. It's back-to-back newsmagazine shows about crime investigations. It's pretty much awesome. After I watched for a few hours (total time vacuum), instead of feeling like I was ready to solve a crime, I moreso felt like I will eventually be killed either by a stranger or somebody who has promised to love me. So maybe the programming should come with a warning.

Things I've learned in the last 12 hours

1. Iron Man Rules. Things I loved: Robert Downey Jr., the robots (I totally geeked out!), Gwyneth ("she should be at home with her kids, listening to Coldplay!"), pretty much everything. I was like this could go on forever and it would still be fun. We were hoping they would surprise us by immediately running the sequel, but, alas, they didn't.

2. Swell Season IS coming to LA!!! Oct 4 at the Greek. Yes please. Very seriously considering the Oct 3 show in San Diego as well!!!

3. Ben Folds is playing with the Nashville Symphony in September. Sign. Me. Up.

4. Grey's Anatomy is still disappointing.

5. It's been too long since I've seen ZB in real life.

6. After watching the girls on Oprah, I'm really looking forward to the Sex and The City movie.

7. Portland is a sex-y city. That's acc to the Chuck Palahniuk book "Fugitives and Refugees." (which offers walking tours of the city)

One month from today...

...I'll be in Grand Cayman.

I'll stay here:



I'll do this:



And hopefully this:



and I will chillax the shit out of a hammock similar to the one shown here:



In addition, I will also take the opportunity to get to know the natives.



Bring. it. on.

In other news, this is perhaps the best shot performance I've seen of my favorite two people singing one of my favorite songs from my favorite movie of last year. I miss Glen and Mar. A little birdie told me they might be headed to LA later this year. I hope that birdie knows what it's talking about. You never know with birds.