Love on the Box

There are several reasons why I will never go on The Bachelorette:

1. I'm not a whore.
2. I would never do anything on tv I wouldn't want my gma to see. (Let's face it, what would the show be without multiple makeouts, hot tub humpings, and fantasy suite overnighters?)
3. I can barely handle the drama and pressure of one relationship at a time.
4. I have a problem being myself on camera.
5. I would never want my overthinking and insecurities to be broadcast worldwide to millions.

That being said, I have an AWESOME idea for what my season of The Bachelorette would be. Wait for it...The CELEBRITY version. That's right. All 25 of my guys would be celebrities. My favorite male celebrities. How many times can I say celebrity? A lot...

So here's my list. I realize some of them are married. That's not my problem. This is a fantasy. I have also left some "insert heres" as I'd like a little element of surprise during the limo meet and greets.

Zach Braff
Taylor Kitsch (Riggins!!)
Seann William Scott
Ryan Gosling
Bradley Cooper
Andrew Bird
George Clooney
Chris Evans
John Cusack
Dave Salmoni (insert tiger growl here)
Blake Mycoskie (TOMS Shoes!)
Zach Galifianakis (pure entertainment value @ the house!)
Braylon Edwards
(maybe insert professional baseball player or another indie musician here)

Married schmarried:

Ben Folds
Dierks Bentley
Paul Rudd
Mark Ruffalo
Jason Bateman
Derek Luke

They're gay, but I'd love to have one on one dates with them anyway:

Anderson Cooper
Neil Patrick Harris

Gone, but not forgotten:

Jimmy Stewart
Cary Grant
Gregory Peck

I mean, seriously. Can you imagine this group of guys in one house? I'm picturing the last three walking around in black and white. It's pretty magical in my head. Basically I wanna be entertained. Make me laugh, play me music...you get the picture. I feel like I'm probably leaving out someone I really like, but let's assume I mean for them to be one of the surprises.

PS Why did Braffers have to look so good last night on Jimmy Fallon?? He's making it super hard for me to not pay several hundred dollars to fly to NYC for 40 hours and see him in his Off-Broadway play.